The Coffee Runner

Staying sane one cup of coffee at a time


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Well it’s been a while

It has been quite some time since my last entry on here. Probably over a month, yeah. Apologies about that but…life gets in the way you know? Anyway, so I just feel like writing this all down today because I need these thoughts out on paper….”paper” as opposed to swirling around inside my own head.

First things first, I’m injured. It’s awful. It’s been present for about 5 days now. It’s been lingering for well over a week and though the pain seems to be fading it’s still quite bothersome. I can’t run, I can’t squat, I can’t bike. It’s a hip flexor/joint injury. I’m chalking it up to running on tight hips and loading too much weight on without properly stretching before squats. Hopefully this will heal in the next few days, maybe not to 100%, but by mid October I’d like to be running my usual mileage again.

This means I may not be able to participate in the Hartford Half…something that kind of saddens me. I’ve wanted to run in this race for a while now, but I don’t want to perpetuate the injury. Sigh, decisions, decisions.

Anyway, so that’s kind of a pain in the ass and I’m letting it rest and getting enough stretching in but every morning I wake up and put weight on it it seems worse. It gets better after morning time and worse at evening. I just want to be able to jump out of bed and go, you know? Come on body! Heal quicker!!! This also means that I haven’t been able to play tennis with nmy dad for a bit. We’ve developed a routine of waking early and going to the high  school to play. I’m  hoping by next week I’m able to get out there. I really miss the fresh morning air and running around…

 

Secondly, school has begun for college kids which means the gym is packed. ALL THE TIME. Mostly with guys standing around the mirrors flexing and admiring but…whatever. It just means more maneuvering. It’s also frustrating not to lift heavy. So…frustrating…

 

I’ve been on the hunt for a full time job for a while now. I have two part time restaurant jobs that treat me well, but again I’ve been out of both for over a week due to my hip. I don’t want to work in a restaurant for the rest of my life…it’s just an in between job and although I love the people there it’s not something I want to make my career, you know? Sigh…

It’s crazy. Employers want people who are “experienced” but they don’t seem to understand that there’s no such thing as an “experienced college student”. And guess what? All of those internship opportunities? YEAH THEY’RE BULLSHIT. I’m not learning how to push papers and file here guys. It’s aggravating. It doesn’t help us actually learn the details and nuts and bolts of the job we want. Half the time we end up choosing a different path than we had initially intended entirely anyway.

 

So last thing…my baby boy comes back in October. He’s been gone for over 8 months for the National Guard. He was in SC for basic and Virginia for his MOS training. I cannot WAIT to see him. Partially because I miss him to death, but also because I’m so FUCKING tired of men who think it’s OK to hit on women with boyfriends. They think they’re being cute by trying to “steal” our hearts away. NO. LEAVE US ALONE. WE’RE IN RELATIONSHIPS. FUCK OFF. You’re not charming. You’re only mildly attractive on the surface. You’ve faded. You don’t know me and never will. You’ll never have my heart.

I’ll see ya’ll on the flip side

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Life Problems

Lately I’ve been faced with a number of personal problems that I feel need to be shared either for the sake of sharing or for advice or whatever. Here’s the list:

1. I feel full after eating literally two bites of anything. It’s strange. It’s not like I’m rushing through meals either. I’m eating my normal diet which is 95% healthy. The other 5% is sweets which have never bothered me. I’m active as hell and usually can gobble down any meal. Perhaps it’s because I’ve been a little less active lately so maybe my body is adjusting to the lower calorie needs? Maybe it understands I don’t need an entire platter of wings or sushi to replenish my muscles. Hmm…

2. Following that, I haven’t been feeling too great lately either. I’ve felt either tired or sick or just queasy. I can’t move as fast as I used to and I don’t feel as strong. I’m getting enough sleep, definitely. Almost too much. I’m not eating anything different. I just feel…mentally and physically drained.

3. I haven’t been exercising nearly as much due to the fact that life gets in the way and I want my body to take a break from all of the constant stresses of exercising.

4. I feel like I am slowly losing sight of all of the hobbies I used to have interest in and floating through life. I thought I was well over this stage in high school and thought it was over but apparently not. I hate these days where I feel like I just floated through. And to be honest, I’m kind of tired of just doing nothing.

5. No spontaneity and nothing new is really starting to get to me.

6. I need to go on a long bike ride after this breakfast and feel renewed.

7. I want to be able to deadlift again and hit some new personal bests in my lifting routine

8. I want to be financially stable again and be able to pay off my student loans and receive my diploma. It’s bothering me that I just blow money on food and drink mostly. Coffee mostly, go figure. I need to be much more frugal with my money.

9. I want real friends, not just the type who talk about each other behind each others’ back or only enjoy your compnay when they’re under the influence. Real friends, the ones I had in high school.

10. Mostly,  I want my boyfriend to come home from Virginia. He’s in the Guard and is training down there. I want him home and safe and I want him in my arms.